


You're The Only One For Me

by rosieeexox



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse, Drug Abuse, Drug Addiction, Drug Use, M/M, drug over dose, lots of drug stuff basically
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-29
Updated: 2012-12-29
Packaged: 2017-11-22 21:13:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/614399
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosieeexox/pseuds/rosieeexox
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Superstar Harry Styles is anything but innocent, and Louis Tomlinson is slightly more so. So when Louis Tomlinson is assigned to taint Harry Styles’ already tarnished reputation, there’s bound to be turmoil. But when things don’t go as planned, how far will Harry go to be with Louis? And how far will Louis go to make sure that doesn’t happen?</p>
            </blockquote>





	You're The Only One For Me

**Author's Note:**

> This was the first chaptered fic I ever finished so leave me feedback! Also, I may or may not write the one-shot/extended ending I had planned for this fic depending on how many people want it.

It was a Monday afternoon that Louis found himself on his way to work sporting a not-so-lovely hangover. The only downside to his job was that a hangover was almost a requirement. The press called Louis Tomlinson a bunch of things, few of them very positive, but Louis didn’t care. He didn’t care that he’d ruined countless of celebrities reputations, thus destroying their careers. He didn’t care that he could never have a functioning relationship because he was practically being paid to sleep around. He didn’t care that everyone thought of him as the lowest of the low. Ok, maybe he cared a little bit, but he chose this job, and sometimes it was great. He got into clubs for free, got drinks for free, got to sleep around with A list celebrities. He was living every fangirls dream. 

Needless to say, Louis did fangirl quite a lot when he would get a new assignment, depending on the celebrity. For example, when Louis was assigned to seduce and destroy Eleanor Calder, he was more than happy to sleep with the young model and find out her secrets. After all, who would pass up an opportunity to sleep with a model?

The men Louis was assigned to proved to be more difficult. Just last week Louis was assigned to find out if Douglas Booth was in fact cheating on his fiancé. And if he wasn’t then, he sure was now that the wedding was called off after Louis got to him.

Louis job required a little conscience and a lot of confidence. Besides, he only went after celebrities who his boss was suspicious of hiding a secret, and he was usually right. Almost every celebrity Louis had gotten to had been hiding a career-ruining secret, all Louis did was coax it out of them and publish it to the world. Totally justified.

Now, because most of the celebrities Louis worked with were older, you can imagine his surprise when he walked into work that Monday and got his new assignment.

Barely legal, 18 year old Harry Styles.

-*-*-*-*-*

Although his hangover had gotten progressively worse throughout the day, Louis still found himself at the club that night. Coincidently, the same club his new assignment Harry Styles, was at. Ok, so maybe it wasn’t a coincidence, but Harry didn’t have to know that. He’d find out tomorrow morning when he woke up with a headache, an empty bed, and no career. As Harry made his way towards the bar, Louis did the same. 

“Three pints, please.” Harry told the bartender, before facing the dance floor and strumming his fingers to the beat of the music.

Louis decided it was time to put his plan in action.

“Three pints, huh?” Louis chucked. “Thats quite a lot. You can handle all that?”

Harry’s face flushed and Louis’ insides churned. Harry looked so young, Louis almost felt wrong. Almost.  
“It’s, uh, for my friends.” Harry said, pointing towards a table on the other side of the dance floor. Sure enough, a blonde kid, a kid with similar hair to Louis’ and a dark haired kid all sat at the table.

“You don’t drink?” Louis asked innocently.

“Not really.” Harry blushed again, looking at the floor.

“Why not?” Louis pressed.

“Dunno.” Harry mumbled.

Louis was determined to get Harry to drink. He knew how little it took for the boy to get drunk, and how reckless he got soon after. He also knew how much easier it would be to get Harry to come home with him, too.

“Let me buy you a drink.”

Harry’s head shot up at Louis offer.

“Y-you want to buy me a drink?” Harry’s face flushed a deeper red this time.

“Yeah! Why not? You were nice enough to get drinks for your friends. Let me buy you a drink.” Louis smiled.

“Well, ok. Yeah, sure. Thanks.” Harry’s smile widened and Louis noticed how cute his dimples were.

“What’s your favorite?” Louis asked.

“I, uh, I dunno. I don’t really drink.” Harry confessed.

“We’ll start you off with a rum and coke, then.” Louis said, waving over the bartender. “A rum and coke for my friend here, and I’ll have a vodka on the rocks.” The bartender nodded and walked away just as the other bartender handed Harry his drinks. “I’m Louis, by the way.”

“I’m Harry.”

“Nice to meet you. Why don’t you go take those drinks to your friends and I’ll meet you over there?” Louis suggested.

“Yeah, uh, sure. We’re, uh, right over there, yeah. Ok, see you.” Harry stuttered nervously before making his way back to his table.

Louis chucked. This was going to be too easy.

After the bartender handed Louis his drinks, he decided to wait a few minutes before crossing the dance floor to Harry’s table. He wanted to give the curly haired boy time to warn his friends about their new guest. After what seemed to be an appropriate amount of time, Louis made his way over to Harry’s table.

“Hey, Louis!” Harry called out once Louis was in earshot. “This is Niall, Liam and Zayn.” Harry introduced his friends, gesturing to them respectively. “Guys, this is Louis.”

“Nice to meet you.” Louis smiled.

“Cheers!” Niall said, lifting his already half-empty pint towards Louis. Zayn joined in and Liam scowled.

“So, Louis.” Liam said pointedly. “What do you do for a living?”

Louis’ facade fell for only a second. “I work for a magazine company downtown.”

“What do you do there?” Liam pressed.

“Everything, really. We print recipes, post fashion trends, run the latest news.” Louis explained.

“But what do you do there?” Liam repeated, his eyes narrowing.

Louis knew about Liam Payne. He was one of Harry’s best friends, and he was extremely protective of him. Zayn was more quiet and laid back, and Niall was absolutely nuts. But it was Niall’s next statement that made Louis decide he was never ruining Niall’s career…if he ever got one.

“Geez, Liam, what’s with the twenty questions? The man hasn’t even sipped his drink yet!” Niall slurred, lifting his pint again. “Cheers!”

“Cheers.” Liam said grumpily, obviously willing to give into Niall.

Louis smiled and took a seat next to Harry.

“Sorry about Liam.” Harry whispered. “He’s given himself the job of being my father figure.” Harry said, rolling his eyes.

“It’s fine. It was actually kind of cute how he was protecting you.” Louis teased.

Harry blushed for the billionth time that night and played with his hands in his lap.

“Do you want to dance?” Louis whispered.

Harry looked at Louis with a horrified expression. “I, uh, I don’t dance.”

“That’s nonsense! Finish that drink and let’s go!”

Harry groaned, but drowned his drink nonetheless.

Louis quite enjoyed the feeling of Harry’s breath on his face as the two danced quite close. He mix of rum and coke and cinnamon made Louis’ stomach fill with butterflies. 

“You’re a pretty good dancer” Louis whispered into Harry’s ear.

Harry let out a soft groan as his only response. Louis’ stomach lurched at the sound and his pants were suddenly extremely tight.

“Do you want to get out of here?” Louis lent forward and whispered in Harry’s ear again.

“Liam wouldn’t let me.” Harry pouted, and Louis decided it was the single most cutest thing he’s ever seen.

“We’ll sneak out, then.” Louis smirked, grabbing Harry by the wrist and dragging him out of the club through the back exit.

“Liam’s gonna kill me.” Harry slurred, leaning up against the wall. His hair was sticking up in places, and some of it was matted against his forehead. His chest was heaving and Louis wanted nothing more that to slam their lips together. So he did.

At first, Harry didn’t respond, but then his mouth began to move with Louis’. Louis pressed Harry harder up against the wall and slipped his tongue into the curly haired boys mouth. Harry reciprocated by pressing his groin against Louis’, receiving a surprised moan in response. The two were a mess of limbs and tongue as the entered the cab. Louis barely had time to give the cab driver his address before Harry was attacking him with his lips again.

As they made their way up the stairs to Louis’ apartment, Louis fumbled for his keys. Luckily, Louis’ bedroom was on the first floor and they made it there in no time. Louis pushed Harry onto the bed and straddles him, rubbing their groins together repeatedly. Harry was a writhing mess beneath Louis and the way his curls were splayed out made Louis have to physically stop himself from cumming right there. As Louis lent down to kiss Harry again, he decided to tease him instead by lightly brushing their lips together.

“Louis…” Harry whispered. Smirking, Louis repeated the action. 

“Louis…stop.” Harry whispered again. Louis sat up and looked at Harry questioningly. “There’s something I have to tell you.”

Louis’s smirk was replaced by a subtle knowing smile. This was it. He was about to find out the secret that he could use to take down Harry Styles’ career. He ignored the pang of guilt in his stomach, because he would not allow himself to get attached to one of his assignments. No matter how cute, nervous, endearing, funny, sexy and fucking perfect they were.

Louis gracefully climbed off Harry’s waist and took a seat next to him on the bed.

“I, uh…” Harry started.

Louis looked at him encouragingly, but Harry looked hesitant to continue.

“The, uh, the only reason I’m telling you this is because I don’t want you to think this a one-time thing. Because I really like you, and I know that’s stupid because we just met but I really feel like there’s something there and I don’t know if you feel it, too, but I really hope you do because that would be really great and-“

Louis cut Harry off with a kiss. Mainly because with the more Harry spoke, the more guilty Louis felt. Here he was in his bedroom with Harry Styles, an 18 year old solo artist known for bringing home a different girl every night, trying to ruin his career. But Harry was making it so difficult when all he kept doing was talking about how much he liked Louis. None of his other assignments ever did that. None of his other assignments ever actually liked him. So it was with well hidden guilt and regret and hesitation that Louis spoke.

“Just tell me, Harry.”

“I’m gay.”

Silence filled the room as Louis processed this. Harry Styles was gay. Harry “I use women because I’m famous and I can do that” Styles. Womanizing Harry Sty-

“Lou?” Harry’s tiny voice pulled Louis out of his thoughts. Butterflies burst in his stomach at the new nickname but was soon plucked of their wings by the guilt.

“Sorry. Just processing.” Louis whispered.

“Shouldn’t you be relieved? I mean, you did bring me back here. It makes it easier for you, doesn’t it?” Harry babbled innocently. But his last question made Louis blood run cold.

“M-make what easier for me?” Louis questioned hesitantly.

“Sleeping with me.” Harry said casually. “That is why we’re here, isn’t it? I mean, I guess you obviously had to know I was gay, right? Since I kissed you and everything. I just wanted you to know. I wanted you to hear it from me. I don’t want you to have any doubts about this. Us. Whatever.” Harry’s babbling was becoming too much for Louis. He could sense how anxious and nervous the younger boy was. He could also sense how much this meant to him. Something came over Louis and he felt like he was going to vomit. The guilt in his stomach was rising into his throat, choking him.  
“Harry stop.” Louis interrupted him. “Y-you have to go.”

“What?” Harry turned to face Louis, green eyes burning into blue. Harry searched the older boys eyes for an explanation. “Why? I don’t understand…”

“I just,” Louis paused for a moment, debating on how much of his career he should give away. “I can’t do this.”

Louis made his way to the door, Harry’s wrist in a firm grasp. Stumbling over discarded shoes and fumbling with the handle on the front door, Louis managed to get Harry onto the porch.

“Louis, wait.” Harry’s voice was barely a whisper.

“Harry, don’t. Please.” Louis begged. Thoughts flashed through his mind about what would happen if he just told Harry the truth, making his stomach churn again.

“Are you going to, uhm, tell anyone? What I told you?” Harry’s eyes focused on the floor.

Louis was going to be sick. Harry had trusted him, and now here he was pushing him away. Harry had confessed his feelings for him, told him his deepest secret and now, even when Louis was pushing him away, still wanted him around. 

“Your secret’s safe with me.” Louis assured him before shutting the door, leaving Harry to disappear behind it. Louis chuckled in spite of himself at his promise. It’s a promise he made to every client before he left for the night. A promise he broke every single time he made it. A promise he intended to keep this time. For Harry’s sake.

-*-*-*-*-*

It was with little excitement that Louis made his way to work the next morning. Usually, he would bounce into work ready to tell his boss the new dirty little secret he found out the night before…but not today. No, today Louis dragged his feet down the long hallway to Mr. Baxter’s office. He didn’t know how he would take the news that Louis had no information for him. All he knew is that he wouldn’t break his promise to Harry.

Even if it costs me my job. Louis thought to himself as he opened the door to Mr. Baxter’s office and saw the big man sitting there. Waiting. I think.

“Louis m’boy!” Mr. Baxter’s booming voice filled his tiny office. “How was your night out with young Mr. Styles?”

“Good.” Louis whispered.

“Good.” Mr. Baxter said, leaning forward, his eyes feeling with greed. Greed for Louis’ next words. The two sat there in awkward silence; Louis not wanting to tell his boss he had nothing for him, and Mr. Baxter waiting for Louis to give up the information he was so eager to hear. “So?”

Louis’ heart jumped at the sudden break in the silence. “I, uh, I didn’t get anything.” Louis managed.

“Sorry?”

Louis gulped. “I didn’t get anything…on Harry. He, uh, he doesn’t have a secret I guess.” Louis played with his hands in his lap.

“Louis.” Mr. Baxter said lowly, leaning forward in his chair. “Everyone has a secret.”

Louis locked eyes with the man in front of him and nearly fainted at the intensity in which his boss was staring at him.

“Go back to the club tonight, then.” He commanded. Louis nodded before getting up and leaving the room. He was no more than halfway down the hallway before he heard Mr. Baxter’s voice again. “Oh, and Louis? If you don’t have something that I can put on the front page of the paper tomorrow, don’t bother coming into work.” 

Louis nodded again and tried to rid his mind of the horrible smirk his boss wore on his face before he disappeared back into his office.

Fucking hell, Styles.

-*-*-*-*-*

As Louis sat at the bar later that night, he prayed every 5 minutes that Harry wouldn’t show up tonight. I mean, surely his boss couldn’t get mad at him if Harry didn’t go out, right? Louis laughed to himself at the thought of Mr. Baxter being considerate and understanding. It was almost 11:30 when Louis was just about to convince himself that Harry wasn’t going to show up and he could go home with a clean conscience when a mop of curly hair walked into the club. 

Harry had two brunettes on each side of him, both wearing what could barely be considered a dress. Something that felt a little too much like jealousy shot through a place a little too close to Louis’ heart at the sight. He shook the feeling away by chugging the rest of his rum and coke and motioned for the bartender to give him another one. 

Louis felt his blood run cold when he noticed the mess of curly hair and green eyes making his way towards the bar. If he could avoid Harry seeing him then he could tell his boss he didn’t talk to him without a guilt conscience. So that would be why Louis was now hunched over the bar with his hood up, angled away from where Harry would be approaching and feeling a little ridiculous. 

The fact that Louis was expecting to hear Harry’s voice didn’t stop his heart from skipping when the younger boy ordered his drinks.

“Three pints, please.” Was all it took for Louis to nearly vomit at the sudden wave of deja vu.

It seemed like it was an eternity later when the bartender finally set the three glasses on the counter of the bar. Louis was just about to let out the breath he didn’t realize he was holding when he heard the voice again.

“I can see you, you know.” And Louis nearly died when he turned around and saw the smirk he was sporting.

“Hey, Harry!” Louis smiled as convincingly as he could.

The two sat there staring at each other before Harry broke the silence.

“So, uh, about last night…I’m sorry if I-“

“No, Harry. No, you didn’t do anything, really. It’s just,” Louis hesitated for a second, the truth on the tip of his tongue.

“It’s just…” Harry pressed.

“It’s just, you’re really great, I just can’t.” Louis sighed and turned back towards the bar, unable to come up with a better excuse. He didn’t want to lie to Harry any more than he already had.

“It’s cool. I’ll see you round, yeah?” Harry said, his voice wavering a bit. He began to make his way back towards his table after grabbing his drinks off the counter and sending one more look at the blue eyed boy who hadn’t spared him another glance.

If Louis had turned around, he would have seen the hurt in the younger boys eyes as he turned to rejoin his friends. Instead, he threw back the remainder of his rum and coke and was out the door before the alcohol had stopped burning his throat.

-*-*-*-*-*

When Harry woke up the next morning, his pounding hangover was the last thing on his mind. First was how to get the sleeping girl out of his bed before his mom came over for a visit. He was momentarily distracted by how familiar the girl’s features were, but wrote it off as just him remembering her from the night before. He gave the blonde a light shove while did nothing but roll her over onto her back. Noticing the gold “L” that hung on a chain around her neck, Harry did his best to remember her name in order to wake her up.

“Laura? Uh, Lauren? Shit, uhm, Lisa?” Harry laughed in spite of himself and the fluttering eyelids of the girl next to him went unnoticed. “Uh, Lisa?”

“It’s Lottie.” The blonde said, sitting up. “And what?”

“Right, yeah. I knew that, uhm,” Harry started, unsure of what to say. Usually the girls he used to convince himself that he was straight were gone by the time he woke up. “My, uhm, my mom is coming by and I don’t know how well she’d take a liking to the fact that you’re here, so, uh…” 

“Yeah, I get it.” The blonde said, rolling her eyes. “Can I borrow your phone? I need to call for a ride and mines dead.”

“Yeah, sure, here.” Harry said, tossing her his phone and leaving the room to brush his teeth.

Lottie redressed herself and got the rest of her stuff together and made her way to the front door, bumping into Harry on his way out of the bathroom. 

“Sorry.” He muttered, and nearly lost his balance when the two made eye contact for what he remembered to be the first time. His green eyes were met with the most comforting and familiar shade of blue that he nearly let the name “Louis” pass through his lips.

“No problem, see you around.” Lottie called as she exited the front door, leaving the curly haired boy in a daze.

It took about 10 minutes for the familiar black car to roll down the street and stop in front of where Lottie was waiting by the curb. 

“Would you like to explain to me why you were so insistent that I come to pick you up instead of mom? I mean, honestly Lottie, it’s an extra 15 minute drive for me than it would be for mom.” Lottie rolled her eyes. She wasn’t even in the car for 5 seconds and he was already complaining.

“Sorry, it just, I didn’t exactly want to explain to mom that I spent the night at some random’s house.”

“Oh, I see, had yourself a little one night stand, did you? Well, who was it, then?”

“Honestly, Louis. I hardly want to discuss my sex life with anyone, especially you.” The blonde said, swatting her older brother lightly on the arm.

“Alright, fine, but a least tell me his name, yeah?” 

“Ugh, fine. But promise not to freak, okay? It was just a really weird coincidence. I mean, me and my friends like never go to that club but we decided to last night and he was just so cute and I didn’t even realize who he was until he made out in the bathroom and I got a good look at his face, but god Louis, he is so cute.”

Louis interrupted his little sister with a laugh. “Geez, Lot. Just tell me who it is already.”

“Harry Styles.”

The ride back to the Tomlinson household was silent except for Lottie’s whisper of “Louis?” every few minutes. On the outside, Louis probably just looked like an angry older brother. But on the inside, he was a mess of rage, fire and small fraction of jealousy (which he chose to ignore, of course.) The second Louis pulled up to the house where his mother and sisters still lived, Lottie was practically tripping up the steps to the front door. He waited until she was safely inside before dialing the number his sister had called him from.

“Hello?” Harry’s confused voice sounded from the other end of the line, and Louis lost it. He screamed and screamed and screamed until he was pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to talk the next day. He screamed profanities and threats (empty ones, of course.) and questions. Harry sat on his bed with the phone held slightly away from his ear, confused but slowly catching on.

That’s why Lottie’s eyes had looked so familiar. Louis had the same ones.  
When Louis was done yelling, the line went quiet. Harry would have been convinced Louis had hung up if he didn’t hear the slight breathing on the other end of the line.

“Lou?” Harry whispered hesitantly.

“What.”

“I’m sorry.”

Silence.

“Lou?” Harry asked again.

More silence.

“Louis.” Harry said, sterner now.

“Yeah, Harry. I heard you. Just, forget it.” And then the line went dead.

-*-*-*-*-*

It had been almost a week since Louis had been to work. His boss’s words echoing in his head. If you don’t have something that I can put on the front page of the paper tomorrow, don’t bother coming into work.

Louis sighed. Even though Harry had fucked his sister, he couldn’t bring himself to tell his boss what he knew. He couldn’t bear to be the cause of the tears that would spill from the emerald green eyes that always seemed to shine. Little did he know, back at his house, Harry was doing exactly that.

The tears had come the morning Louis had yelled at him, and every morning since. It also didn’t help that he often dreamt of Louis’ bright blue eyes and swollen, pink lips and flushed cheeks. It was with that image in his head that Harry started to cry harder. He had ruined everything. He and Louis probably could have been friends if he hadn’t gone and fucked his sister.

“Christ.” Harry mumbled to himself as he made his way over to the bottom drawer of his dresser. Taking out what he needed, Harry sat back down on his bed. He debated over calling Louis not that he had his phone number, but eventually decided against it. So, as Harry slipped the needle into his arm and felt the drugs coursing through his veins, Louis sat at home waiting for a call that would never come.

-*-*-*-*-*

Over the next week, it got to the point where Harry only left his house for one thing; more drugs. His previous addiction was nothing compared to now. He forced the drugs into his body from the second he woke up until the very last moment before he fell asleep. Maybe he was hoping for an overdose, or to wipe his memory. Or maybe he was just hoping for his phone to light up with one word.

Louis.

Louis’ life wasn’t much different, though. But, instead of turning to drugs to forget his problems, he turned to alcohol. He even drunkenly called his boss to see if he could just get a new assignment. “If you can’t even break Harry god damn Styles, then how can I expect you to break anyone else?” And a string of profanities was his response.

-*-*-*-*-*

It was about two weeks after the phone call that Louis decided to go out. Coincidentally, so did Harry. At first, Louis thought he was hallucinating the head of curls bouncing around the dance floor, especially since the body those curls belonged to were pressed up against a girl with a very large chest. Before jealousy could strike him, Louis was swarmed with panic. It seemed like only seconds later, Harry was making his way over to him.

“Louuuuu!” Harry yelled much too loud, even though the music was blaring. “How’re you?”

“I’m fine, Harry.” Louis responded, not even looking at the younger boy.

“So this is Louis, eh?” Louis spun around where he stood to see brown eyes, black hair and dark skin. 

“Sorry?” Louis asked.

“Oh, nothing. It’s just that, since I was finally able to get Harry out of his house a few days ago, he’s talked about you non-stop.” The dark haired boy explained nonchalantly. Louis darted his eyes to Harry quickly enough to not catch his eye, but slowly enough to see the blush forming on his cheeks.

“Hell,” The nameless boy continued. “Hasn’t even brought a girl back in almost 2 weeks. Not since that last girl. What was her name?” Louis blood ran cold. Harry shook his head and mumbled something. “‘Course you remember, Harreh! You know, the blonde one? With the nice ass!”

“Lottie.” Louis said angrily.

“Lottie! That was it! How’d you know, Louis?” The other boy seemed extremely surprised.

“She’s my sister.”

The three of them were quiet for a minute. Louis kept himself as calm as he could, while he watched the dark haired boy piece everything together.

Eventually there was a mumble of apologies and awkward introduction in which Louis learned the other boys name to be Zayn, and then a farewell on his part which left the two of them standing there uncomfortably. 

“Sorry about Zayn.” Harry offered.

“S’fine.”

“Can I buy you a drink?”

“No, I don’t think so, Harry.”

There was silence for a few moments before Harry spoke again. ”He was right, you know.”

“About?” Louis asked curiously.

“I haven’t brought a girl home since, uhm, since, you’re…” Harry trailed off.

“Yeah? Good for you.” Louis replied sarcastically.

“Louis.” Harry breathed. “Let me buy you a drink.”

Louis only nodded, sending the younger boy darting across the room to the bar. The second he was out of sight, Louis made his way out of the door and into the crisp night air. He barely spared Harry another thought as he made his way home, threw himself on his bed, and went to sleep drunkenly mumbling something along the lines of I wont let me hurt him.

Harry, on the other hand, searched the club several times before realizing Louis had left. Disappointment and hurt bubbling in his chest, Harry threw back the two drinks in his hand, grabbed the first girl he saw, and was on his way home.

Once he was through the door, he escorted the girl to his bedroom and then slipped himself into the bathroom. He placed the needle in his skin for what seemed like the billionth time since his fight with Louis and, once he was sure the drugs had kicked in, went back to fuck the brains out of the pretty girl sprawled out on his bed.

-*-*-*-*-*

After the night with Harry at the club, Louis returned to work begging for a second chance. Mr. Baxter, fully aware of Louis being his most prized employee, agrees.

The weeks pass and Louis tries as hard as he can to avoid being in the club for too long. He works hastily, but efficiently and Mr. Baxter is more than pleased. Louis, however, is disgusted with himself. Every time he fucks the secrets out of some poor, unknowing celebrity, he’s reminded of those piercing green eyes, and how disappointed in him they’d be if they knew.

It’s been at least a month since he’s last seen Harry, and Louis doesn’t know if he’s more relieved or worried. He’s read the petty articles in the paper about Harry’s constant drug use and partying and a part of Louis wonders if it’s because of him. If he broke the younger boy without meaning to.

Mr. Baxter is pissed, of course, that he’s not the one running the articles of Harry’s career spiraling out of control and “For Christ’s sake, Louis, how did you miss this?” But Louis doesn’t care. As long as he’s keeping his promise to Harry, he’ll deal with the backlash.

A few days after the stories of Harry’s sleeping around and constant shooting up in public bathrooms have calmed down, Louis makes a mental note to check up on him. That, however, happens sooner than expect when he walks into the club that night and right into none other than Harry Styles, who’s green eyes look far too pleased to see him than Louis would have liked. Louis swallows the lump in his throat as he looks Harry up and down.

The boy is painfully skinny and his cheek bones look more prominent than he remembers. But all Louis can focus on his the smile on Harry’s face, and the gleam in his eye.

“Hey Lou.”

“Hey Harry.” 

“How are you? You look good.” Harry says cheerily.

“Thanks. You, uh, you too.” Louis chokes out. 

Harry chuckles. “You don’t have to lie to me, Lou. I look like shit, you can say it.”  
“So it’s true then?” Harry nods and Louis sighs. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Harry chuckles again, but its forced. “What did you want me to say? ‘Hey Louis, I’m gay! Oh, and I’m also addicted to heroine! Surprise! Let’s date!’”

Louis’ breathe gets caught in his throat as he tries to get a response out.

“You don’t have to say anything.” Harry says quietly. “Im just glad you’re here.”

“I shouldn’t be.”

“Well I’m still glad that you are.” Harry slurs, taking a step closer.

“Harry, stop.” Louis whispers. The pout that forms on the younger boys lips leaves a huge crack in Louis’ heart. Not as big as the crack that’ll be in his when he finds out who you are. Louis reminds himself. “Harry, listen to me. You have to go, ok? Go home, go to bed and get yourself cleaned up, alright? You’re better than this.”

“No, fuck that. Don’t give me that bullshit, Louis.” Harry says, his voice getting louder. “I’m not losing you a third time.” Harry pauses. “Do you wanna know why I’ve been using so much? Because I can’t stop thinking about you, and I hate it. And after I shoot up, all I can think about is how good it feels. I don’t have to think about how much I miss you. I just…” Harry’s voice trails off and Louis feels like he’s going to be sick.

“Harry-” Louis’ voice cracks.

“No, Louis. You’re not leaving me, and I’m not leaving you.” Harry says sternly.

“Harry, you can’t-“

“Watch me.” Harry winks before grabbing Louis by the wrist and dragging him through the club and out the back door.

“Harry, stop.” Louis tries to protest, but his will is slowly being taken over by brown curls and green eyes.

Harry hails a cab, and the second the two are inside the car, Louis’ lips are on his.

-*-*-*-*-*

Louis wakes up the next morning with a numb arm and something tickling his neck. He opens his eyes to see a sleeping mess of curls and limbs attached to his side. Louis sighs and tries to slip out from under the younger boy to no avail.

Memories from last night flood Louis’ mind. He had jumped Harry in the cab, and the surprised yelp the younger boy had let out only fed Louis’ lust. By the time they had gotten back to Louis’ house, any doubt Louis had about his feelings for the younger boy had disappeared. Louis was in too deep.

Harry shifted slightly, then rolled over so his back was to Louis. The red scratch marks trailing down the pale skin on Harry’s back only reminded Louis more of last night. He had let Harry pound into him like there was no tomorrow. Usually when Louis worked, he was the dominant one, but letting Harry take control of him was one of the best things he’s ever experienced. The younger boy thrusted into him with so much passion that Louis almost forgot to warn him about leaving love bites on his neck. And when they were done, Harry curled into his side and placed chaste kisses on his neck until he fell asleep, whispering sweet nothings into his collarbones. Louis fell asleep only minutes later, but not before realizing how long its been since he’s actually spent the night with someone.

-*-*-*-*-*

The next week and a half was filled with Louis skipping work to sneak Harry into his house, or Harry sending a car to pick Louis up and meet him at a motel just outside of London. Needless to say, Mr. Baxter was less than pleased when Louis finally showed up to work after a week, but Louis didn’t care.

The two had agreed on a strict just-sex relationship. Harry had an appearance to maintain and, unbeknownst to him, so did Louis. That agreement, though, only lasted about a week before Harry became determined to take Louis on a date.

“I can’t, Harry.” Louis says for what seems like the billionth time that day.

“But why?” Harry whines. “Just tell me, Lou. Why can’t I take you to dinner?”

“Because, you just can’t. It’s complicated.”

“What’s complicated about going to dinner?”

“If someone see’s us…” Louis trails off.

“They’ll think we’re mates.” Harry finishes for him.

Not when they see me. Louis thinks to himself. 

“And why’s that?” Harry asked, his brow raised.

Shit.

“I, uh, because I…” Louis stutters.

“Just tell me, Louis.”

Louis sighs. “You really want to know?”

Harry nods, following Louis over to the couch and curling into his side like he always does.

“I can’t go out to dinner with you because we can’t be seen together. Ever.” Louis says softly.

“But why?” Harry asks, his voice muffled by the fabric of Louis shirt.

“Because,” Louis sighs. “Because I work for Barry Baxter.”

Realization dawns on Harry’s face. “S-so you, uh, you’re one of those people who, uhm, sleep with celebrities and then spill their secrets?” Harry swallowed hard.

“I’m actually, uh, the only one.” Louis admits. “I mean, other people work there, but, uhm, nobody else does what I do.”

“So, all those people who can’t get a job anymore…that’s all because of you?”

Louis feels the guilt rise up in his stomach. He’s never thought of it like that before. “I, uh, yeah.”

The room is silent for a minute before Harry asks the question Louis knew was coming, but so desperately did not want to hear.

“Have you ever had to do that with me?”

Louis doesn’t respond. He can’t.

“Louis?” Harry asks, sitting up so he’s facing the older boy. “Have you ever had to do that with me?”

Louis can’t do anything but stare at the younger boy helplessly.

Harry takes in a deep breath. “That’s how we met, isn’t it?”

“Harry, I-“

“Isn’t it?” Harry says harshly.

Louis sighs again. “Yes.” He whispers.

“So this is all apart of the job for you then?” Harry yells, getting up from the couch and reaching for his jacket.

“Harry, no!” Louis’ voice cracks.

“Don’t you dare lie to me, Louis.” Harry turns around with watery eyes.

“Harry, I’m not lying, I swear, I-“

“How long until the article about me being gay comes out, then?”

“Harry, no. Just let me explain-“

“How long, Louis.” Harry sighed, defeated.

“I haven’t told anyone.” Louis admitted. Harry scoffed. “I’m serious, Harry. I told you your secret was safe with me, and it is.”

Harry turned around to face the older boy. Tears stained his cheeks as new ones formed in his eyes. “Why?” Harry asked, his voice cracking.

“Because,” Louis took a deep breath. “Because I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“Yeah,” Harry chuckled darkly. “And look how that turned out.”

“Harry, please.”

“What?” Harry shouted. “This is what you wanted, isn’t it? The other day at the club when you wanted me gone? Well, now you’re getting your way. We’re done, Louis. Whatever this is, it’s finished.” Harry made his way towards the door. Louis stood there, tears falling from his eyes.

“Please don’t go.” Louis whispered just as the younger boy reached the front door.

“Give me one good reason why I should stay. So you can get more information out of me? Maybe you can just fill your fucking magazine with a whole article on me. Hey, I’ll even give you a headline. ‘Harry Styles, gay drug addict.’ You’ll make millions, Lou.” Harry spat.

Louis flinched. The nickname that used to make his heart skip now felt like a stab in the gut.

“Give me a reason.” Harry said, waiting in mock-patience.

“Because I really like you.” Louis sobbed.

“Yeah?” Harry scoffed. “Well you have a really funny way of showing it.”

The front door slammed and Harry was gone. Louis stood there for a few minutes staring at the door, tears freely falling from his eyes. He waited for Harry to run back in, wrap him in his arms and kiss away the tears. He waited for the forgiveness that would never come; forgiveness that he knew he didn’t deserve.

 

Harry somehow made it back to his house and now found himself in his bedroom. His breathing was heavy and broken, and the neck of his shirt was drenched in tears. He rummaged through his drawers until he found what he was looking for. Not bothering to tie up his upper arm, Harry injected the contents of the needle into his bloodstream.

There was a rush of adrenaline and then everything went black.

-*-*-*-*-*

Harry wakes up three days later with the sudden urge to vomit. He opens his eyes to make his way to the bathroom, when he realizes he’s not in his bedroom.

“Ahhh, he’s awake.” Harry turns his head to see a middle aged man in a white coat standing at the end of his bed. 

“Hello, Mr. Styles. My name is Dr. Greg. You overdosed on heroine a few days ago and passed out. Your friend Zayn found you a few hours later and called an ambulance. Do you remember taking the drugs, Mr. Styles?” The doctor asked.

“Yeah.” Harry said softly, his voice hoarse.  
“Judging by the marks on your arms, this is not the first time you’ve used, is it? Do you mind me asking why you didn’t tie up your arm first?”

“I just…” Harry felt tears prick his eyes. “I just wanted to forget.”

“Forget what, Harry?” The doctor asked softy. Before Harry could respond, the tears started falling from his eyes and he couldn’t stop. He cried for almost an hour, the doctor rubbing his back comfortingly the entire time. 

Once Harry had calmed down, Dr. Greg tried again. “Now, Harry. What were you trying to forget?”

“It wasn’t so much a what, rather than a whom.” Harry replied.

“Alright then. Who were you trying to forget?”

“Doesn’t matter. It didn’t work.” Harry mumbled.

-*-*-*-*-*

A few days after Harry is released from the hospital, he’s admitted again. This time, for an overdose on cocaine. When he wakes up, he sees the same doctor, in the same room, and asking the same question.

“Who are you trying to forget, Harry?” He asks quietly.

“Why does it matter?”

“Because this is the second time in a week you’ve been admitted for an overdose.” The doctor explains.

“So?”

“So I’m concerned. But listen, we don’t have to talk about it right now, alright? I’m just going to give you a mild sedative to keep you calm, and we can talk about it tomorrow, alright?” The doctor asks, moving closer to where Harry lay in the hospital bed.

“No!” Harry protests, but the drugs are already making their way into his system. The mild sedative turns out not to be mild enough, because soon Harry is thrashing around in the hospital bed screaming slurs of “No.” “Need Louis.” and “Where’s Louis?”

It takes an hour and a half, a phone call to Zayn and a phone number from Louis’ parents before the hospital is able to reach him.

-*-*-*-*-*

Louis is laying in his bed watching a re-run of Gilmore Girls when his phone rings.

“Hello?” He answers.

“Hello. Is this Louis Tomlinson?”

“Yes, who’s this?”

“This is St. Mary’s hospital. We have a Mr. Styles here and you’ve been requested. He’s been quite unstable and asking for you, is there any way you can drive over and calm him down? I know it’s quite an odd request, but-“

“I’ll be right there.” Louis says, already halfway out the door.

The drive to this hospital is longer than he thought, leaving a million questions to wrack his brain. Like how the hospital had gotten his number. Or what Harry as doing in the hospital in the first place. And if that’s why the tabloids keep running stories about him being in Paris as a coverup. But most importantly, why Harry was asking for him.

The lady at the front desk gave Louis a reassuring smile as she directed him to the room where Harry was. Louis took a deep breath before turning the door handle and stepping inside. Louis nearly choked at the sight. Harry was being held down by three nurses, while the doctor tried desperately to calm him down. The door slammed behind Louis, causing all five heads to turn in his direction.

“Lou?”

“Harry.” Louis breathed.

The curly haired boy had stopped his movements, but was now frantically trying to sit himself up and look at the older boy. Sensing Harry’s new calm, the doctor ordered the nurses to let him up. In an instant, Harry was darting across the room and flinging himself into the older boys arms. All eyes were on Louis as Harry sobbed into his shoulder whispering forgiveness and apologies.

-*-*-*-*-*

Eventually, Harry had fallen asleep in his hospital bed, his arms wrapped tightly around Louis’ waist. The doctor tilted his head in the direction of the door, and Louis slipped out of Harry’s grasp to follow him out.

“You have quite an effect on him.” The doctor said, once the door to Harry’s room had been shut.

Louis blushed, unsure of what to say.

“Are you two good friends?”

“You could say that.” Louis answered. Guilt bubbling in his stomach again. “We kind of had a falling out. I guess that’s why he’s here, though, isn’t it? Because of me.”

“Louis, is it?” The doctor asked. Louis nodded. “When I talked to Harry the first time about why he had overdosed, he said he was trying to forget about someone. Do you have any idea who that person might be?”

Louis’ eyes met with the doctors, and he lost it. He sat in the chair outside the door trying to regain his breath as the tears fell freely from his eyes. The doctor rubbed his back, much like he had Harry’s, until he was calm again. Once he could speak, Louis told the doctor everything. For the first time in his life, Louis let himself be completely honest with someone.

After he was finished explaining the story, the doctor was quiet for a few minutes.

“Louis, I-” The doctor sighed. “I think you and Harry need to have a talk. He needs someone like you in his life. And I don’t mean the Louis that works for Barry; I mean the real Louis. The Louis that you are when you’re with Harry.”

Louis nodded and the two of them stood up. Dr. Greg patted Louis’ shoulder reassuringly before disappearing down the long hallway.

When Louis walked back into the hospital room, his blue eyes were immediately met with green.

“Thought you left.” Harry croaked out, his body becoming noticeably more relaxed.

“Don’t throw another fit, Hazza.” Louis chuckled, climbing into the tiny hospital bed. ”I’m not going anywhere.” The second Louis had made himself comfortable, Harry’s arms were wrapped around his waist like they had been before his talk with the doctor, and his head rested lightly on his chest.

“Harry, I-“

“Louis.” Harry interrupted him. “It’s ok.”

“No, Harry, it’s not.” Louis shifted to get a better look at the younger boy. “You’re here because of me.”

“That’s-“

“Don’t you dare say it’s not true.” Louis warned.

Harry nuzzled into the crook of Louis neck, the movement of his lips sending tingles up and down Louis’ spine. “I forgive you.”

“You shouldn’t.”

“But I do.” Harry whispers. “I don’t care about what you do for a living. I don’t care that if you ever start to hate me, that all my secrets could be published. I don’t care that we have to keep whatever this is a secret. I just don’t care, Louis. I can’t bring myself to care about any of the bad stuff, just as long as I have you.”

“Do you really mean that?” Louis asks. Harry nods, his grip on Louis’ waist tightening. Louis sighs. “Alright then, it’s settled. I’m quitting the tabloid.”

Louis took a deep breath before opening the door to Mr. Baxter’s office for what was hopefully the last time.

“What’s so important, Louis? I have work to do.” Mr. Baxter asked, not taking his eyes off his work.

“I, uhm, wanted to talk to you about-” Louis whispered, sitting in the chair in front of Mr. Baxters desk.

“Speak up, son. I can’t hear you when you mumble. Just say what you have to say and get out of my office.”

Louis heart pounded, and he could feel his stomach bubbling in his throat. “I quit.”  
Mr. Baxter stopped writing and looked up. Louis eyes flashed to the ground. “Excuse me?”

“I quit.” Louis said more confidently, making eye contact with the big man.

The room was silent for a moment before Mr. Baxter chucked. “Great joke, son. Now leave my office so I can get back to work.”

“It’s not a joke, sir. I’ve already taken my stuff from my desk.”

Mr. Baxter sat there quietly. He glared at Louis for a minute, studying his actions. Louis heart was about to explode. “What are you still doing here, then?”

“I-I dunno, sir.”

“Then leave.”

“Right, yeah.” Louis stammered, getting up from the chair and exiting the office. He breathed a sigh of relief as he walked out of the building and drove away with a smile on his face.

-*-*-*-*-*

“You really quit?!” Harry asked, disbelieving.

“I really did.” Louis beamed, stepping into the doorway of Harry’s flat.

Harry threw himself into the shorter boys arms, pressing light kisses to the top of his head. “Let’s go to dinner tonight.” 

“Are you sure?” Louis bit his lip

“Positive.” Harry said confidently, pecking Louis on lips.

-*-*-*-*-*

Louis woke up the next morning in Harry’s arms and sighed contently. He planned to visit his mom and sisters for the week and wanted to get an early start, but couldn’t bring himself to break free of Harry’s grasp. He laid there for a while before a gravely voice broke him out of his thoughts.

“What time were you leaving?” Harry mumbled through his morning voice.

“About an hour ago.” Louis chuckled.

“Sorry.” Harry whispered, tightening his grip on Louis’ waist.

They laid there like that for a few minutes.

“I really should get going, Haz.” Louis sighed, getting up from the bed. “Still gotta pack.”

Harry pouted as Louis redressed himself and made his way to the door.

“Not gonna walk me out? Such manners, Hazza.” Louis teased, exiting the room.

Harry scrambled out of the bed in his underwear, not bothering to put pants on, and grabbed Louis by the waist before he could make it out the front door. Louis spun around as Harry pushed their lips together. The stood like that, kissing in the doorway of Harry’s flat, for what seemed like hours and seconds at the same time, clinging to each other like it was the last time they’d ever see each other. Eventually, Harry pulled away.

“You really need to get going, babe.” Harry mumbled, pecking the shorter boys nose.

Louis flushed and nodded. “I’ll see you in a week!”

“See you.”

“Don’t miss me too much!” Louis called, making his way down the pathway towards the sidewalk.

“I’ll try.”

“I’ll text you when I get there.”

“Call me instead.” Harry smirked.

“Try not to forget about me while I’m gone!”

Harry laughed. “Will you get going already? At this rate, you’ll have to leave the second you get there!” Harry called, rolling his eyes. When he looked forward again, Louis was racing towards him. He bounced into the taller boys arms and pressed their lips together. Harry could feel himself smiling, but it was nowhere near as hard as Louis.

“I love you.” Louis whispered, and then he was gone.

“I love you, too.” Harry called after him, shaking his head. After Louis’ car had pulled away, Harry picked up the newspaper on his doorstep. He unfolded it to look at the front page, and his heart stopped.

-*-*-*-*-*

“Mom? I’m home!” Louis yelled once he’d dropped his bags by the front door. Before he knew it, he was being attacked by a mess of dirty blonde hair and long skinny arms and legs. The twins wrapped themselves around his calves, while Lottie and Felicite jumped into his arms. “You lot are getting too big for this.” Louis laughed, struggling to make it to the kitchen.

“Alright, alright!” Jay shouted, biting back a smile. “Let me have my turn, yeah?” The girls climbed off Louis and he barely had time to breathe before his mom had her arms around him. 

Once his family were done fussing over him being back, they ambushed him with questions.

“So what’s new?” Jay asked innocently, a smirk playing on her lips.

“Charlotte Tomlinson! That is the last time I trust you with a secret!” Louis yelled in fake anger.

Lottie made a noise of protest, but Jay cut her off. “Any particular reason you quit?”

“Honestly, Lottie! I can’t tell you anything anymore!”

“Mom!” Lottie whined.

“Sorry, sorry!” Jay laughed. “Although she did spare me the name…”

Louis sighed and the kitchen went quiet in anticipation. “Harry Styles.”

“I knew it!” Phoebe yelled excitedly. “He’s the one with the pretty green eyes right?”

“I like his hair!” Daisy exclaimed.

Louis blushed. “Yeah, yeah. He’s great. How are you all?”

“Oh, come off it, Lou! You know we’re going to spend the entire week talking about him!” Lottie laughed.

Louis sighed. It was good to be home.

-*-*-*-*-*

The week in Doncaster felt like it had been entirely too short. If it wasn’t for a certain curly haired boy waiting for him back in London, he might’ve never left. Suddenly, Louis felt panic shoot through him. He’d barely texted Harry all week, save for the I’ve arrived safely and I’ll call you later x which went unanswered and unfulfilled. That, and the fact that random romantic gestures were his forte, is the reason Louis found himself in the expensive flower shop a few blocks from Harry’s flat.

With roses in hand, Louis made his way to Harry’s door and knocked. After a few minutes without an answer, Louis knocked again. He sighed and took out his phone from his pocket.

“Hello?” Harry answered.

“Open the door, yeah? I’ve got a surprise for you.”

The line went dead and Louis was about to call back when the door opened. Expecting some sort of embrace or welcome, Louis opened his arms, only to be met by Harry’ cold stare.

“What’s the matter, Hazza?” Louis asked worriedly.

Harry scoffed and walked into the living room where he plopped himself back on the couch and resumed watching tv. Louis’ heart sank when he sat down next to the younger boy and he flinched away.

“Are you really that mad I didn’t call? I’m sorry, Haz, I really am! I got really caught up. I got you flowers.” Louis offered.

Harry sat there silently, so Louis did, too. After a few minutes, though, Louis was about to go crazy. Placing the flowers on the table, Louis stood up.

“Are you quite finished? Cause I’d like to have a proper welcome now.” Louis asked, standing in the way of the television.

Harry said nothing and continuing to watch tv as if Louis wasn’t there.

“Harry, seriously. What’s wrong?” Louis whispered.

Wordlessly, Harry reached over to the table. He picked up a small stack of newspaper, knocking the flowers off the table. He held them in front of him, not taking his eyes off the tv. Louis took the articles out of his hand and his eyes widened. His eyes scanned each one, his blood boiling by the second.

Robbie Williams’ new friend.

Is Cher Lloyd cheating on her fiance?

Nick Grimshaw gets cozy in the club.

Olly Murs finds a new lad.

Rita Ora and her mystery fling.

“You don’t honestly believe this was all this week, do you?!”

Harry was silent.

“Harry?”

Harry broke his eyes away from the tv and locked his eyes with Louis. Louis could see the hurt and sadness swimming in the pools of green and his heart just about broke.

Louis sat on the couch beside the younger boy. “Harry, I swear, I visited my family this weekend. Those articles were from weeks ago, months even!”

Harry didn’t speak. Louis sighed. “Well, fine!” Louis said, louder that he intended. He dropped the newspapers where they were on the table. He wondered, for a moment, how many times Harry read the articles, thinking Louis was cheating on him. It made his blood heat up and anger bubbled in his stomach.

“I spent the weekend with my family, not in some club!” Louis shouted.

More silence.

“So that’s it then? Are we done here?” Louis asked shakily. Harry looked at him for a moment and shrugged. “We’re not going to talk about this?” Louis pleaded desperately.

“I have nothing to say to you.” Harry spoke finally. His voice was low and final.

Tears welled up in Louis eyes. “Fine then.” Louis voice broke. Tears were already spilling from his eyes as Harry sat there silent and motionless, his eyes focused on the television in front of him.

Louis turns and makes his way out Harry’s front door. He stands on the doorstep for a second, trying to catch his breath as his world crumbled around him. Hearing the door open behind him, Louis spins around. Hope fills him to the brim when he sees Harry standing there, flowers in hand. He doesn’t notice the stoney look in his eye until the flowers are at his feet and the door is being slammed in front of him. 

Louis picks up the flowers and carries them to his car. The tears aren’t falling anymore. He doesn’t feel like crying. He doesn’t feel anything. With the flowers in the passengers seat, Louis starts his car and drives home. 

-*-*-*-*-*

About an hour later, Louis is looking at the wilted flowers on his desk. He’s been staring at them for what seemed like days. Harry didn’t want him anymore. 

After another hour, the roses were dried out completely. Louis scooped them up and threw them in the trash before grabbing his keys. The flowers were dead and falling apart, just how Louis felt.

-*-*-*-*-*

Louis took a deep breathe before opening the door.

“Louis m’boy!” Mr. Baxter looked up and smiled. “I knew you’d be back.”

The next few days pass by in a blur of alcohol, sex and spilled secrets. Louis has ruined just about every career he could get his hands on. Almost everyday there’s a new article in the paper with the next biggest scandal on the front page. It makes Harry sick.

So sick, in fact, that not even his constant use of heroine and cocaine (and whatever else he can get his hands on, really) can get rid of it. So, while Louis is out drinking and partying and sleeping around, Harry’s in his room with a needle under his skin and a bottle of vodka.  
If anyone notices Harry’s new behavior, they sure don’t mention it. He’s more careful now, though. Careful not to overdose and end up back in the hospital. He takes enough to make him pass out, and makes sure he’s in his bed when it happens. Sometimes, though, instead of using drugs to lull himself to sleep, Harry settles for crying. It’s those nights, that Harry stares at his phone for hours on end, tears staining his pillow, wishing his phone would light up with the name of the person he needs the most. He never tries to call him, though, because if Louis wanted to talk to him, he’d call.

Louis does that sometimes, too. Cry. When he’s getting ready to go out, after he’s done his job, every morning when he wakes up, every night before he goes to bed, and just about every other moment in between. He tries to call Harry sometimes, but can never find the courage to press the call button. If Harry wanted to talk to me, he’d call.

-*-*-*-*-*-*

1 Year Later.

“Louis?” Stan calls into the empty flat. He hears a muffled “In here!” and follows it until he’s in the middle of what used to be Louis bedroom. “What’re you doing in here?”

“I was checking under my bed to make sure I didn’t forget anything.”

“You’re ridiculous.” Stan laughs, brushing the dust out of his friends hair. “Still can’t believe you’re moving to New York in a few days.”

“Yeah, well.” Louis shrugs. “I wanna start off the new year on a good note. I need a fresh start. This year…it wasn’t a good year for me.”

“I know.” Stan replies, patting Louis on the shoulder reassuringly. “Let’s get to this party though, yeah?”

“Yeah.” Louis nods.  
-*-*-*-*-*

Louis looks up at the giant hall hesitantly. This time last year, he’d assume he’d be at a party like this under false pretenses. When he finally quit his job at the tabloid - for good this time - Mr. Baxter seemed to understand. Apparently, they already had a replacement lined up. He still got invitations to London’s biggest parties, though. Including JLS’s New Years Eve party. All the biggest celebrities are invited, but Louis wasn’t concerned. As far as he knew, Harry was still in and out of rehab; or “on holiday” as his management disguised it. 

“It’s freezing out here.” Stan complained. 

“Yeah.” Louis said, breaking out of his thoughts. “Yeah, let’s go inside.”

The two immediately shivered as they entered the warm air and Louis scanned the crowd. Everyone was wearing party hats, so it was hard to determine if there were any curly haired popstars. If Louis was honest, he didn’t really care about seeing Harry. He just wanted to make sure he was ok, and that he was going good, and that he was happy, and - ok, maybe he cared a little bit.

He decided to go to the bar and that’s when he saw it. A tiny flash of green eyes behind the row of alcohol bottles behind the bar.

“Excuse me.” Louis mumbles to the bartender, making his way to the other side.

Before he can get close enough to the crowd of people, a large man in a suit stops him.

“Do you have a pass, sir?”

“A pass for what?” Louis asks confusedly. 

“For the VIP section.”

“Oh.” Louis’ face fell. “No, sorry. I didn’t realize there was a VIP section. I just wanted to see if-” Louis trails off, standing on the tip of his toes to see over the heads of the people standing around.

“Sorry, sir, but I can’t allow you to enter.”

“Yeah.” Louis sighs. “It’s fine, sorry.”

Louis turns and heads back to the bar. It’s not him, Louis. Relax.

-*-*-*-*-*

It’s a few minutes to midnight and Harry is getting really sick of drinking virgin piña coladas and strawberry daiquiris. He groans when his manager hands him another one.

“I was addicted to crack, not alcohol.” He spits.

“Doesn’t matter. We don’t need you getting addicted to anything else.” She replies, before walking back to the bar.

Harry groans again.

“Don’t worry about it, babe.” Nick kisses his cheek. “She’s only looking out for you, you know.”

“I know.” Harry sighs. “I just wish she’d trust me a bit more, you know?”

“Well, maybe she will once we bring in the new year.”

Harry laughs. “Maybe.”

“Wanna go join the rest of the party on the dance floor?”

Harry hesitates for a second before nodding and allowing Nick to drag him out of the VIP section and onto the dance floor.

He’s mid-spin and nearly looses his balance when his eye’s catch a familiar shade of blue. Louis.

Without thinking, Harry makes his way through the crowd of people. He’s a few feet away when Louis notices him, closing the space between them and wrapping Harry in a tight hug.

“I thought I saw you before!” He shouts. “But I couldn’t get into the bloody VIP section because I’m not a pretty little popstar.”

Harry laughs. “What’re you doing here? You’re not-” Harry’s smile falls. 

“No, no, no.” Louis smiles, waving his hands. “I’m not working. Gosh, Harry, keep up with the tabloids, yeah? They’ve replaced me with someone prettier than me.”

“No one’s prettier than you, Lou.” Harry says before he can stop himself.

Louis blushes. “Thanks, Haz.” He lets his eyes run up and down the curly haired boy’s body. “You look really good, Harry.”

Now it’s Harry’s turn to blush. “Thanks. I feel good. ‘Been clean for 6 months, now.”

“That’s really great, Harry. I’m really proud of you.”

“Thanks.” Harry smiles at the ground. “So, what have you been up to if you’re not working then?”

“I’m actually moving to New York in a few days.”

“Oh.” Is all Harry says. And, after a few seconds, “I have a new album coming out soon.”

Louis feels like he’s about to cry, so he wraps the younger boy in another hug. If Harry notices the single tear Louis lets escape and fall onto his neck, he doesn’t mention it. Harry breaks the hug and his arm hits into someone behind him. He turns to apologize and notices it’s Nick.

“Nick!” He says excitedly. “Meet my friend, Louis. Louis, this is my boyfriend, Nick.”

Louis shakes Nick’s hand and tries not to flinch at the word boyfriend. “Nice to meet you.”

“You, too.” Nick says simply. “I’ve actually heard quite a lot about you.”

“Wish I could say the same.” Louis smiles. “You seem like a top lad for my Harry, here.”

Harry’s stomach flutters involuntarily. His Harry.

Nick nods his head and looks at Harry anxiously.

“Right, well,” Harry says, breaking the awkward silence. “It’s almost midnight, so me and Nick are gonna find a good spot by the tv. I’ll see you later, Lou! And good luck in New York!”

“Thanks, Harry.” Louis smiles. “See you.”

Louis finds Stan just as everyone begins to countdown.

10, 9, 8…

“Find no one to kiss at midnight, Lou?” Stan teases.

“Shut up.”

7, 6, 5…

“Harry’s here.” Louis whispers.

Stan nods.

“He’s doing good.”

Stan squeezes Louis’ shoulder comfortingly.

4, 3, 2…

Louis eyes find Harry’s.

1.

“HAPPY NEW YEAR!” The room is filled with cheers and claps and kisses.

Louis pulls Stan in for a hug and laughs as his bestfriend presses a sloppy kiss to his cheek. His eyes find Harry’s again and he mouths a “Happy new year.”

Harry’s face lights up and he mouths back “Happy new year, Lou.”

After that, Louis let’s Stan drag him towards the bar and gets himself properly drunk.

Harry never saw Louis after that, but that doesn’t mean he never thought about him. He thought about him a lot, actually. Almost every day Louis found a way to creep into his mind, and he hoped Louis was experiencing the same thing. Sometimes it’d be a flash of blue on the street, or a loud laugh in a crowd.

Everyday he was reminded of Louis Tomlinson; the boy who made Harry Styles fall in love.


End file.
